Waiting Game

Cherry Blossoms by Debora Louks

Hello Everyone!

It has been a few weeks since I have published something so here we go...

I was an Army spouse so I had it drilled into me that the Army, the government in general, operated on a 'hurry up and wait' basis.  So,  I have always tried to be patient and wait...well for most things.  I try to be nice when waiting in line and waiting for doctor appointments.  I get that waiting is a part of life.  I have had many hard, first hand experience waiting for things or on people.  It wasn't like it is now when everyone expects everything now.

So, with that said, I think that I am pretty good about waiting.  I try not to get my hopes up too high.   Finding a kidney is not an easy nor fast thing.  I know it hasn't been long, relatively speaking, but other times it feels like forever.  I had 90 days to complete all of the extensive tests done to get to a case review for acceptance.  I have tried to do my own leg work as far as getting the word out that I need a kidney, but it isn't easy.  There can be a lot of resistance during the process.  A lot of people or businesses don't want to be involved.  It is a shame.  The problem is it isn't like I have an extensive amount of time.  I try not to think about it so much; time is precious to me.  And yes I will continue to wait as long as it takes or until this life ends.

I am trying to occupy my time with creating memories for my family and leaving them a legacy.  After all, we all want to be remembered and make an impact on someone's life.  Don't we?  I am making quilts for my grandkids.  I am writing letters to my grandkids for them to have when they are older.  I have a memory book for them.  I am trying to digitize family photographs for my family.  I feel sometimes that I am one of the last ones in my family that cares to know about our ancestors.  So, I am trying to share all of this with my little Nathen and Abigail in hopes they will remember.  I just hope I don't run out of time.  It's ironic that when I was younger I used to feel that there wasn't enough time to accomplish all I wanted; now that feeling may possibly be a reality.  My doc, Allen Bryant is very hopeful and I do feel hopeful that there will be a kidney when the time is right.  I try not to think about it much, but today I am.

Tomorrow I go and get the monthly injections and lab draws.  I hope my veins last!  The injections are an attempt to keep my blood count up and increase my energy.  I was so extremely fatigued last month.  I am finally beginning to have more energy.  After all I have a 4 and 5 year old to keep up with! 

Well then....I will keep waiting!

Until later....

Deb